I’ve been a couple steps behind you for quite some time. I have been following your every move but not seeing who you were or what you looked like. But it didn’t matter to me.

I knew what I wanted.

Your foot prints still pressed fresh in the evening’s snow. Funny thing about them is, that they lead me straight to your front door.

Knocking gently for centuries.

The door opens for what seems like hours, heart pounding a mile a second and I can hardly breathe.

Exposure.

This is the girl I have been tracking down for all this time? She’s even more beautiful than my imagination could even fathom.

Her face lights up as though she’d been waiting for me the entire time I’ve been searching.

That smile, oh that smile.

Enough to make even the strongest man go weak.

She opens the door even wider and invites me in, almost immediately I forgot about the bitter cold that wrapped it’s boney fingers around my entire body. Everything that worried me lost it’s importance. You’re the soda to wash down the burn of the alcohol.

Inside your front door.

Am I breaking a stranger’s barriers with my charm? Because you don’t seem like a stranger at all, I feel like I’ve known you for years.

We crept closer and closer until our lips were an inch apart. Not a single word was expressed, only instincts. My heart is pounding out of my chest, palms are sweating, and breaths grow shorter. Brushing the bangs out of your eyes so I can get a better look, running my fingers down your jaw line and place your chin between my fingers only to pull your lips up to my own.

Contact.

Engulfed in the birds flapping their wings inside of me, Lifting me off of my feet.

I have been numb for so long I didn’t know I was even capable of feeling anything anymore. And no, I’m not talking about the cold. There is chemistry here only we can understand.

Be my babe.

joshuaweaverweekly:

Savannah, GA

joshuaweaverweekly:

Savannah, GA

Laying in sheets of scarlett, the sun beaming in through the blinds to welcome the new day.

Rebirth.

Too afraid to leave the comfort of the blankets that held you close through out the night. You hear the door creak, and in hovers an angel bearing the medicine I have been searching for, for as long as I can remember…

And I’m not talking about the pills.

This angel came in the most peculiar packaging, wearing her nighmares on her sleeve. Maybe this is just what I needed.

My thoughts have been completely comsumed by your smile. That kind of smile that makes your knees cave in. That feeling where it seems as though you’ve known eachother for years. Don’t run away from this, because that’s my job.. But for once I’m not going anywhere if I have any say in it.

You came into my life at the perfect time..

Where all the wounds are healed and I’m free from the shackles of depression.

So welcome to the fresh and new Matthew Taylor Morgan.

Enjoy.

“I love you Matthew”

Those are the words that left your lips and made me uneasy.

My teeth are rotting out of my skull from the vomit titled “Words” that keep expelling all over the sidewalk in front of your leather cake shoes.

I know you and the way you work, like a puzzle with context clues. But I’m the only one who picked up on it. The worst thing to admit to, is the fact that you know how to weasel [fox] your way into my veins through the smallest scratch, flow through my blood stream crossing every vital organ that could easily destroy me if you sank your teeth into them, But that’s not what’s important to you, it’s making that journey north bound like the L-train, to my brain where you can do what you do best… Take control. Get inside and put me right back where I started in the first place.

I’ve been pacing back and forth for years now, that I’ve finally dug six feet deep. I’m in over my head and there is no turning back. All you have to do is shower the dirt over top of me in my hole and you can call it a day… But why haven’t you? Is there something you’re not telling me? Or and I reading too much into false hopes and never being able to be satisfied with anything less than what I had those night in your bed. Dreaming the same dreams when we are on pills…
Or sitting for what seems like minutes were actually days in my car, dropping mountains out of the windows on each side.

I’ve never felt more of a zombie than I do anymore, my eye lids hang heavy and are as blood shot as ever. But what can I do about it?

You’re the bird that has finally broken free of her cage and I am the worm that you’ve been watching through your bedroom window for months…

Now’s your chance

So take advantage and finish out your final scheme.

What are you waiting for?

Welcome to Hell.

Except Hell has finally frozen over.

Stepping out of your box with the false hopes of the sweet kiss from the suns warm lips. To wake up in the reality of the razor blades hidden in the air that dig into your lungs with every breath you take. Followed by the sting of the cold on your warm flesh. There is always the initial exhale that you’re smoking, only lacking a cigarette.

You layer your skin with false relationships and games that burn to your core.

This is no way to live.

But I don’t have to tell you that.

I’m the ocean walls that are clearly posted “DO NOT CLIMB ON THE SEA WALL” but of course, you’re going to do it anyway just because you were just told not to. And when you fall and break every bone in your little body, to only be washed ashore along with all the other poor girls who didn’t listen to the signs. And blame your faults on someone else. When it was clearly posted.

Pretending that you know me, but that’s a funny trick, because I don’t even know myself, so who the fuck are you claim you do?

Be careful what you ask for, because my heart is surrounded by the Berlin Wall.

And if some how you managed to hurdle these steel reenforced concrete walls, you’re going to be picked off by the Nazis waiting on the other side.

Built to keep out the unwanted, and undeserving.

So take a jagged piece of driftwood from your splintered heart, and write your final memoirs in the sand, because tonight’s high tide will wash it away, to create another clean slate for someone else to make the same mistakes.

Champagne For My Real Friends, Real Pain For My Sham Friends

I’m the kid missing part of his face, not that it really matters because I spend my time hiding it behind bodies. I’m known for my work and what I’ve done, not who I am as a person.

But that’s surprisingly fine with me, my art has become my face. It is what I crave to be known for, however, when will someone come up to me and not know anything about me after I say my name out loud. I like being known for my career path, but I want people to want to get to know me as a person.

Or do I?

Am I better left as a mystery?

Or am I, as a person, worth getting to know?

Oddly enough, I don’t even know what people would find out about me. Because I’m not even positive of who I am anymore. I’m just another character in the computer program this life has created.

A drone.

Something I have been systematically programmed by my creator. Blind in the sense I know what my future has in store, but I want to know specifics.

Where will I be?

Am I going to do everything I desire in this life? Or am I going to have the cord ripped from the wall and my system go haywire. This is what I wonder everyday. But how much of my life is actually predetermined. I’m young and successful, but not in every aspect. I always hear that if you want things in life it’s all sacrifices, and I already know what I’ve given up. I am always on the road and never have a chance to settle down with a significant other.

But maybe that’s just it, I married Guenevere.

I feel like it might have been a rendition of a shotgun wedding.

Except without a gun to held to the back of my head, I’m willing to take on the responsibilities of my talent, I know the world needs what her and I have to offer, but is it worth this loneliness?

I am 20 years of age, I have a lot of life left to live and I can only IMAGINE where this life will take me.

But will it lead me to you?

http://neeshu.com/Articles/true-love-scientifically-proven.html